Dating | Weddings

Getting Married Abroad

People used to run away to Gretna Green to tie the knot; now it tends to be Mauritius or anywhere else with an azure blue sea and some swaying palm trees. If the exotic appeals to you, make sure you understand what it'll mean for your big day.

Who do you want with you on the beach as you say 'I do' under a radiant sun? Will you be husband and wife legally when you get home? What will you wear?

Consider who you would like present, and for how long. For a long-haul destination it is only fair to expect guests to be around for a week, as they will probably have to eat into their annual holiday. You need to allow for this if you are staying in the same destination for your honeymoon (perhaps marry half way through the week so you don't have your new in-laws as chaperones the entire time). Consider the cost of your destination, too; you must be prepared to accept that some guests will be unable to make it due to the expense.

"WE'RE NOT RUNNING FROM, WE'RE RUNNING TO."

You'll have to handle the announcement of your plans carefully. Some friends and family will be very disappointed, so be prepared to deal with their feelings sensitively. You could take them for a meal or hold a party on your return to give everyone the chance to share your good fortune. Importantly, let them know that you are going away to fulfil a dream, not choosing to leave them all behind.

MAKING IT LEGAL

To ensure that your marriage is legal in the UK, you have to be sure that you fit the UK criteria: you must not be underage, awaiting a divorce or married to someone else. To make it legal in your country of choice, then you must ensure that you fit their criteria. It is important to find out the legal requirements. These can include a minimum period of stay in the country (and often a certain number of days before the ceremony can take place). For example, in America you need a blood test, and some countries have religious restrictions. You also need to be aware of the country's public holidays and festivals; you don't want to arrive and discover everyone is out at the carnival. Each country will also demand documents - birth certificates, passports and evidence of single status (e.g. divorce documents or death certificate of a former spouse) - and the embassy or consulate can help you determine which.

HANDING OVER THE STRESS

There are now many reputable tour organisations that offer wedding packages. They can take care of everything from ceremonies to honeymoons. This is good option if you are planning to marry somewhere every exotic or with a language you don't understand because they can provide someone with specialist local knowledge who can help out with any problems that might occur.

The tour company can often organise the ceremony and find the celebrant, and even offer wedding cakes, photographer, flowers and champagne. Make sure you check what you're getting, though - the local Chateau de Gastric '89 might not be to your taste. As you often have to be in your chosen location for a few days before the ceremony, you might prefer to make your own arrangements for flowers and decoration - a collection of seashells from the beach and some local blooms, for instance.

Most tour operators ask for photocopies of the required legal documents (e.g. birth certificates) to be sent to them around two months before travelling. The original documents should be carried on the journey.

JUST A G-STRING EACH

When choosing what you want to wear, remember that your outfits need to be comfortable and not too hot, so if you're off to Jamaica for a beach wedding, leave the wool morning suit at home, along with the fifteen meters of French Chantilly lace veil. You may favour a slinky, tiny white bikini and cowboy hat, but if you want something more elaborate you need to make sure it travels well. This may have a strong influence your choice - remember that stuffing fifteen layers of petticoat in a suitcase will cause the kind of damage to the dress that might never bounce back. You should check with your airline if there is somewhere your outfits can be hung; if not, you need to choose something that can sustain a little stress, such as synthetic fabrics, which crush less. You can also get small hand-steamers to take out creases, or book ahead with your hotel for the laundry service to primp and preen your outfits.

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