Blind Dates

Blind dates are a great way to get back into the dating swing or give you a little perk up if you are in a dating lull.

Even if you aren't looking to hook up with someone permanently, it's a good way to remind yourself that there are interesting people about without having to do the whole pick-up scene.

Before you go off on a blind date, you might even like to try organising one, which will give you a good handle on how the whole thing works. It's a great way to get you into a new way of thinking, so don't write it off.

Playing Cupid

Taking a look at your male friends, the people that you haven't considered (ever or for a while), can help you see what you like in a guy, but if you're fixing up a blind date for someone else make sure you don't confuse your desires for those of your friends. Your predilection for nature-loving, woodsman types might not work for your cocktail-loving, party girl mate. Having said that, don't just abandon the idea; make sure you ask what she really wants right now - she might be ready to hang up her slingbacks and get homely in a wood cabin. Don't make assumptions.

On the other hand, two people might look good together at first glance, but you need to think if they have similar goals and interests. A chatty crowd-pleaser might work great with someone who is more composed, so think compatibility and not just similarity. And do remember that two giant egos in one room could end in blood dripping from the walls. And, while we're on the subject, don't strongarm a friend of your brother to take your newly heart-broken sister out on a date, you might end up crushing her confidence further if the phone doesn't ring twice. A good intention does not make a great romance.

Hitting the perfect pitch

You think you have a good combination in mind, so how to proceed? Firstly, you need to get both parties interested and the key, here, is to make sure that you don't apply too much pressure. Don't tell your friend that the guy you want to fix her up with is the most gorgeous man you have met; she may wonder why you aren't interested or not have the same taste in lanky, boyish charmers that you do. Give the blind date a good build-up but keep it realistic to avoid disappointment. Also, don't fall into the 'too much information' trap; if it does work out, your in-depth description of his fumble behind the photocopier with the work experience girl at the office party (complete with photocopies) will come back to haunt you all.

Are you blind?

If you're the one receiving the attentions of a nurturing matchmaker, make sure that you also keep within the boundaries of common decency. It's fine to ask for information such as his job, a vague recent romantic history (divorced, kids?), and an insight into why the matchmaker thinks you might be compatible. Make sure you have enough general background so that you can say something like 'Suzy says you're training for the marathon,' should things dry up over the main course. It will make him feel appreciated and warm. However, slipping in 'How's the treatment for the premature ejaculation going?' is probably a bridge too far.


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